How to please a woman in English

This article was inspired by numerous Internet resources, concluded with my own understandings

Ma Jiao (Jocy)

There are no ugly women in the world, only lazy ones. To please the hardworking women, we need to give some arvosanat. The simplest way seems to be our exam grading scales: 0 is of course…something you would not even want to see. 1 and 2 definitely need improvement (must have been lazy).

Usually your brain and body start to feel good when you see an exam paper graded at 3 and above. But wait…would you talk like this, "That chick can be given a 4!" No way guys, women are much more complicated and diversified than exams. Here I would like to give you a vocabulary list on how to please a woman in English.

Good-looking: If she looks comfortable, you can call her "good-looking" (British) or "good looking" (American). This word also applies to boys. Good looking does not describe HOW good she looks; if the girl is not a 0 you can already call her good looking to please her.

 This is a word without personality, say, it does not belong to the 1-5 grading scale, it is the "passed" and "not passed" grading method. Be cautious if you think that the girl should be graded 4 or 5, this might not be the word she wants to hear. Besides, it is simply too shallow; it shows that your observation stays on the surface. Finns use "hyvännäköinen" too often in my opinion.

Pretty: If she is the girl next door, you can call her "pretty", pretty does not mean VERY good looking, it is grade 3, but this has a bit to do with personality: she is probably pleasant and nice.

Beautiful: If she is outstanding in the crowd, for example, ten girls sat together and when you walked into the room you noticed her first, this girl could be called "beautiful".

"Beautiful" is at least be given grade 4. However, this word is too commonly heard and I do no recommend using it with every beautiful girl you see, it has nothing to do with personality, although you can still please a woman if she is not too often flattered with that word. However, "kaunis" never goes wrong.

Lovely: "Lovely" can be used with any girl you like; this has more to do with personality rather than the look. A lovely girl is definitely someone you want to date, or even to marry. Mukava is also a word with personality, so when you think of "mukava" you can use "lovely".

Adorable: there is a slight difference between lovely and adorable. They both mean lovable, but adorable also means admirable. An adorable woman is not a little girl; she has got her own ideas and makes you feel that she is respectable.

Handsome: "Handsome" is usually used to describe a man, but when used with a girl, the word illustrates a girl riding on a horse or practicing Kong Fu; she is sporty, outgoing and independent. On the other hand, handsome is only grade 3, you should try to use some other words to describe the girl as well.

Gorgeous: Originally, this was a word to describe women in evening gowns and jewelries, nowadays you can just whistle to a girl passing by on the street, "Hi gorgeous!" (OK I know you won´t do that before some five beers.) But, still, use it in vuosijuhla, if you ever need to speak English.

Elegant: She is in a light-pink suit and skirt with a pearl necklace, she talks about world economy or Monet´s paintings. This has more to do with status; however elegancy can always upgrade a woman´s original grading.

Dazzling: Well I would immediately recall diamond jewelries when I hear this word…dazzling has a strong visual effect, it is not suitable for a woman in sports wear. It is a good word; try to use it on a sunny summer day/evening with a girl in halter-neck and shining accessories.

Enchanting and glamorous: Very good words, she has magic! You are bewitched; you would do anything for her. (I would feel that I am very special to this guy upon hearing of these two words because there must be some chemistry between us.) She might be 3 in others´ eyes but 5 in your opinion, and that is just great.

Classy: A good word to be used together with some other word. This is a very nice word because some girls are tired of hearing the word "beautiful", when you use this word she could feel that you perceive her in a different way and maybe you are just the one she wants.

Sexy: You can use this word on anyone you want, but girls from conservative cultures might get embarrassed and think that you are a bad guy.

Attractive: Like two magnets of opposite polarity, she makes you wanna get closer to her. This can mean either personality or sexuality, but it is relatively abstract, I suggest fueling it with the other words.

Magnetic: Well it is just the same as attractive. Personally, I think "magnetic" is a bit too physical and magnets are cold and hard, but some girls might consider it romantic.

Striking: Hah, you have got a heart-attack by looking at her. She impressed you, and you keep on thinking of her all the time. A good word, but do not forget to tell her what or how she has impressed you. Usually a striking woman makes you want to run into a relationship.

Exotic: Personally I do not like this word at all. "Exotic" means both "foreign" and "sexually attractive". You´d better choose some other words.

Stunning: This is more than 5. A stunning woman is like a movie star, a super model, or a beauty queen. She is ABSOLUTELY beautiful, which means almost no one would disagree about her beauty. She is like the sun, she burns your eyes, and you feel dizzy by looking at her. (Upon here, I discovered that the word "ihana" could have meant 90% of all those words I have listed above…I guess I should be happy if someone described me with that word.)

Charming: It is more like a word for men. Charming can be used to describe her personality; however it makes me feel that the woman is a bit aged. I do not recommend it anyway.

Ravishing: This word is like a joke, so you can use it with your friend, "You were so ravishingly beautiful in the party and I think that guy was totally attracted by you." To ravish someone means to take away his soul.